Where I'm Calling From

Alright, it’s Christmas. I don’t know if that’s important or not, it’s just a fact. Usually I hate to think of myself as someone who’s overly influenced by traditions and standards and all that kind of thing but I think it’s what you might call “Christmas Spirit” that’s making me want to write this.

I’ll be honest, I’ve written a lot of stupid bullshit here in the past, and going back over it, as well as the various reactions I’ve had to it make me feel like I’ve misrepresented myself somewhat. I know I might come across as a little bit angry, maybe a bit hateful and a little superior, but I’m not any of those things. I feel like I need to set the record straight on a few matters. Sounds ominous right? Let’s read on...

I don’t like the idea of being above anything or anyone. I know sometimes it might seem as though I see myself as some sort of moral or intellectual authority but I honestly don’t think of myself that way and I don’t say the things I say to make myself out as some fucking hero; I’ve never set out to try to make myself look good or to make anyone else feel bad. I realise I might come across as a bit superior at times but all it is is that I have things that I believe in and care about very deeply and I think it’s important to communicate this. Maybe I go about it in the wrong way sometimes, but I wouldn’t be the way I am if I didn’t care. The thing is that I’m a pretty intelligent guy and this is the only way I know to live my life; now that’s not something I’m particularly proud or ashamed of, it’s just another fact. Besides I really don’t think it’s what’s important. So what is?

Let’s think for a second. It’s easy to get the idea that you are the most important thing in the fucking world but the fact is that you are not. Our lives, our thoughts and feelings and actions and personalities are completely inconsequential on a universal scale. The vastness of your insignificance is completely incomprehensible to you or me or anyone. Just look out your window and think about how fucking small you are. Does this mean that nothing we do is important? Absolutely not. The fact that our lives are so tiny negates any lofty ideas we might have about a universal meaning and puts the utmost importance on the way you live your life right now, this very moment and every moment. You have to try to do the right thing in every situation you find yourself in because at that point, that situation is all you have and it’s all that really matters. There’s no bright future ahead of you when all your wrongdoings are redeemed and all is forgiven, you have to be as good as you possibly can be right now. And I know it’s hard. Life is not easy and it’ll always leave you frustrated, dissatisfied and confused, but it’s no solution to resort to hatred. No good can come of blaming the world or the people around you for the shortcomings in your life, and no good can come of giving in to the adversities you’ll face every fucking day of your life. I think that’s why I do what I do, because I can’t stand the idea of giving up on what I believe in. And if it makes me seem like an asshole, or if it makes me unpopular with anyone, then at least I’ve reached out and tried to make a connection instead of just keeping my shit inside. I think there’s too much of that and I’d love to see a world where we could all give up on fear and regret, and just do and say what we think is right without being afraid of the consequences. I’m not trying to say that’s the way I live all the time or that I’m right because of it, I’m trying to say that I try.

I think that it’s only though total honesty and openness that we can ever form the kind of relationships that we all need to help us through our lives, and to answer the question I posed earlier, those relationships are what’s really important. It doesn’t matter even half a shit whether you’re the smartest, or the toughest or the prettiest person or whatever, the important thing is how you interact with, and impact on the lives of the people around you. Whether it’s your best friends who love you and support you and challenge you every day, or your family who raised you up into the person you are, or even just the one guy or girl that can always make you feel happy and good about yourself no matter what, these are the things you need to be fucking grateful for. I’m lucky; I have all of these things and more, and even though I act like a dick sometimes I appreciate those people more than anything. More than you’ll ever know. That’s all I’ve got to say. Merry Christmas.

Die Jugend Marschiert -or- Stick The Fucking Flag Up Your Goddamn Ass

Looks like it's remembrance day today. First things first: how many of you assholes actually remember anything about the war? No I didn't think so. Get a better name. Furthermore, remembrance day is the most immense amount of bullshit you'll ever hear about in your fucking life. Here's why:

The First World War, upon which the whole sorry institution is based was, almost inarguably, a swing and miss of epic proportions for every concerned party and it's not, in my opinion, something to be honoured. Now, don't shit yourself about my lack of compassion just yet - I'm not trying to tell you that I think the 15 million (!) motherfuckers who died had it coming or anything like that. I agree, it was an incomprehensible tragedy, but think for a moment - it was not necessary and nor was it justified. What the wearing of a red poppy does is to honour the fact that a bunch of rich and powerful assholes managed to send a generation of their respective countries' poor to their deaths in order to serve their own ends. That's what remembrance day really remembers. War is rarely, if ever, a necessary and unavoidable course of action, but it is always a humanitarian catastrophe, and the commemoration of the incompetencies of past governments seems completely ridiculous to me.

Remembrance day is a pro-war institution, and you're a fool if you think otherwise. You simply cannot participate in an event enacted by the military, (an organisation the very existence of which stands in the way of peace [the universal establishment of which is more than likely a stupidly idealistic pipe-dream anyway, so ignore this parenthesis]) which is carried out by soldiers to remember other soldiers who died, which is emphatically encouraged by a government similar to that which sent (and still sends) it's young men to be killed and then treated those who returned with a brutal indignity, and which glorifies war (yes it does) and claim to be horrified by the event which gave rise to it. If you're anti-war, you can't participate in remembrance day, or else you're a fucking hypocrite.

Having said that, all this pro-life, anti-young-people-dying-as-soldiers talk is, you might've noticed, fairly moderate. And regular readers will know that here at Luke McGinty HQ we're not all that moderate. Here's the real story:

Soldiers are fucking idiots. From the gung-ho patriot serving his queen and country right now in Afghanistan to the poor kid seduced by those "let's all be good mates and never kill anyone" army recruitment adverts to the WW1 conscript, every soldier history has been a pure and simple dullard, or worse. The army, despite the rhetoric and sophistry that often surrounds it, is and ever was a tool of the government. I don't believe any government in this country has ever been elected because the nation as a whole wanted to go to war and kill foreigners. I don't think anyone could argue that, and the conclusion is that whenever the army has been sent to war, the government has failed the people it has a duty to serve. Any intelligent person would have no part in such an endeavour, and remembrance day is intended to celebrate those who do; those who would fall for the sort of deceitful propaganda used to attempt to justify the unjustifiable. In short, idiots. It's a celebration of the repression of conscious and conscientious thought and of unthinking dedication to a weak and flimsy ideology, namely that one's country (read: government) is worth fighting for.

Long story short, what the army does is it kills people. And joining the army under any circumstances (bearing in mind that conscientious objection existed, and flourished in certain quarters, even during the First World War throws into relief the frankly ignorant argument from cultural difference, and the idea that my writing this in the midst of a different cultural zeitgeist makes me some sort of arrogant fool who doesn't know of which he speaks) makes you a fucking moron. Not to mention a potential, if not actual, killer. Remembrance day celebrates killers. Lest we forget...

On The Road

Here's something you might not know about your beloved author: I don't eat meat and I never have. Just one of those things. And I know what you're thinking: "wtf Luke? that's crazy lol, why don't you eat meat?" Well I can't be bothered to tell you right now, that'll probably come later but the point is that if you're an idiot you might be the sort of idiot who asks this idiotic back-up question: "what if you were in, like, a plane crash, and you were trapped in, like, the mountains or somewhere, and there was only, like, steak to eat. Would you eat meat then?" Well my answer would be the same as always. "Don't be such a fucking idiot, of course I would." Just keep that in mind as you read on.

This is actually something I meant to write a pretty long time ago but I've only just got around to it now, so it might not be as accurate or as relevant as I would hope. Sorry about that everyone; I know you come here for the clarity of thought and the well-structured opinions that are usually on display, but just this once you're gonna have to put up with me rambling for a while with no apparent purpose or direction. Just this once alright?

Ok, what we're talking about just now is The Road. The Road is supposed to be one of the most important things in the past how many years and it's been called "gripping beyond belief," "a work of terrible beauty" and "shocking and harrowing but ultimately redemptive." Frankly I thought the work itself was pretty middle of the road (heh) but we'll maybe talk more about that later. First let's have a think about why The Road is terrifying but fundamentally flawed.

In case you don't know, there's a guy (the Man) and his son (the Boy) and they're amongst the few survivors of some terrible apocalyptic event and they're seeking redemption from near-certain death by walking a very long way for a long time along an awfully long road (the Road.) That's the plot in a nutshell, but the story behind the story lies in the Man and the Boy's relationship and their interactions with each other and the world. The Boy is depicted as innocent and well-meaning while the Man is a harsh realist who feels duty-bound protecting his kid. There's also a lot of Christian-style morality involved, and the man talks about God quite a lot, and that's pretty disappointing in something that had a lot of potential to be very anti-bullshit. Anyway the accepted line of thinking, as far as I can see, is that the terrifying thing about The Road is the fact that the Man and the Boy are the only good left in the world and they're forced to face off against horrifying horrors like cannibalism, baby slaughter, humanity reverting to survival-of-the-fittest primitivism, all that kind of thing. And the terrible beauty of the thing is the way they support each other and the fact that the Man is prepared to go to extraordinary lengths to protect his son and, by extension, innocence and the unsullied goodness that the Boy represents. Now this is a nice idea but it's pretty stupid, here's why:

It's true that the Man would probably go to insane lengths to protect his kid (I don't want to generalise here, but most parents would) but the problem is the ridiculously moralistic way he goes about it. Have you heard the expression there's no such thing as an atheist in a foxhole? Well it actually depends just how small your foxhole is, and I would imagine that when you find yourself in a really fucked situation, the exact opposite is true. The Man would be desperate to protect the Boy and for that reason I'm pretty he (or anybody else) would happily sack off his morals to do so. Remember the people they were keeping prisoner so they could cut bits off them and eat them? He would do that. And remember the spit-roasted baby? He'd probably do that too. (Get your mind out of the gutter, that's in the traditional sense. Although to spare his own kid's life who knows what a guy might be capable of?) Here's something: There's a thing in psychology that explains human behaviour; it's an upside-down triangle with your basest needs and desires at the bottom and as it broadens out it encapsulates all the shit that isn't really necessary but makes your life easier or more comfortable. And the thing is you have to satisfy the stuff at the bottom before you move on up. It's like having to force your way through the Green Hill Zone even though it's boring and easy and stupid before you can even start thinking about collecting all the Chaos Emeralds. So food comes right at the bottom, then shelter above it and so on like that. The point I'm trying to make here, the point I think got missed in The Road, is that morality is way at the top of that scale, probably somewhere between love and butt plugs. And that's why it's flawed, and it's also why it's terrifying: because after the apocalypse (which won't involve zombies by the way, so grow the fuck up) there almost certainly won't be any such thing as the Man, just a lot of people going around trying to eat bits off of each other and kill babies. So there you have it: why Luke McGinty is right about The Road, and almost every pointdexter in the world (who all seem to like it for some reason) is fucking wrong. Oh, and if you're too lazy or stupid to look into this yourself, they also made a film out of it.

Just one more thing: that was Sonic the fucking Hedgehog, man. I can't believe you didn't know that...

You Can Put All My Possessions In Jesus' Name -or- He'd Been To School But Never Finished -or- Everyone's A Critic And Most People Are DJs

Hi assholes. I know it's been a moment since I've written anything; we've been closed for refurbishment, didn't you notice? I was worried the standard blogger.com default settings were making me look like an amateur and I don't have to tell you that there is nothing amateur about this operation. Christ no.

Ok so what's been happening? Well I'll tell you: I'm thinking about converting to Catholicism. I mean, not really but it's a funny idea isn't it? Do you even call it conversion if you weren't anything before? I don't know. Anyway the thing is I've been listening to the Hold Steady quite a lot recently and that's sort of made me give the big C some thought (not that one. OR that one...) Did you know that one dumbshit critic once called Separation Sunday "the most egregiously American Catholic album since X's Under the Big Black Sun, Springsteen's Tunnel of Love, or that Jewish new waver Billy Joel's The Stranger." Yeah I know; egregious? What a dumbshit. But more about dumbshit critics later. Right now it's Catholicism. Actually religion in general but here's a quick thing first - did you notice that I wrote the Hold Steady earlier? Is "the" supposed to have a capital letter or what? The Hold Steady or the Hold Steady? If anyone cares at all, help a brother out. There's a comments section for a reason you know...

Alright, Catholics. Sorry if this seems like teaching your granny to suck eggs or whatever (odd expression, by the way...) but Catholics are fucking weird. So are Muslims. The whole thing about these people is that their belief, and their faith, is fucking unshakable man. Do you know anyone (weirdo Catholics and Muslims aside) that's like that? Someone with even one conviction that they have an absolute certainty about. Cos I certainly don't, and it's pretty fascinating to think about it. I suppose there's something to be said for that kind of unwavering dedication to your ideology, and there was a time when I would have had lots of respectful things to say about insane religious wingnuts. This actually reminds me of a time when I got myself into a bit of hot water in a politics class back at university (I know man, you wouldn't think it to read this goatshit, but yes I've been there...) when the tutor was talking about the idea of a post-9/11 world, Islamic fundamentalism the influence of terrorism on international relations and all that kind of thing and he asked the class what we thought about the whole scenario. And what I was thinking at the time was that the very existence of suicide attacks speaks of a culture of people about a hundred times more morally fortitudinous than any that I've ever encountered. Not that I would have, or ever have, advocated that sort of violence on the basis of religion, but at that time I might have argued that, although mass murder is a terrible frontier to take it to, belief on that scale is evidence of a strong system of values and a certainty of faith which is marginal at best in our society and which casts a harsh light on the shallow, instant-gratification culture that most of us subscribe to, whether you agree with those values or not. And even though Allah and his heaven are a huge pile of total bullshit, surely an unequivocal belief in him shows more strength of mind than a passing interest in Justin Bieber or whatever? Anyway that's what I was thinking at the time. And what I said was "I'm right behind al Qaeda to be honest..." Yeah you're right; good one Luke.*

Anyway that's enough of all that, because everything I thought about fundamentalism at that time is actually bullshit, here's why: the fact of the human animal having the capacity for abstract, cognitive thought makes the idea of fundamental belief completely redundant. Even worse, it makes it a hallmark of a terribly unsophisticated mind. I'm trying my best to think of a way to explain what I'm talking about here; let's think about designer t-shirts for a second. Have you ever considered how ridiculous it is to wear your t-shirt with some designer's name on it? You see, the trouble is that even though they're called "designer" clothes, the dude with his name on it didn't fucking design anything, the company just printed his name on your shirt, and to buy into the idea that having some douchebag's name on it makes your shirt any better than a plain white or something is tantamount to surpassing the logical, rational notion that your shirt's anything more than a sweat shield/boob suppressor which is in turn tantamount to saying "I have not the capacity for logical, rational thought." I think this allegory is getting out of hand. What I mean is that t-shirts are like religion because what's happening is you're putting unconditional faith in something that has no logical basis and simply can't be proven. And that, assholes, is the stupidest thing you can possibly do, here's why: because whatever you're beliefs are (unless we're talking about the gravitational constant being 9.81g or something) you are fucking wrong. This is simply because what you believe will make sense to you and you alone, and as hard as it may be to admit, if 5,999,999,999 people think you're opinion is bullshit, that pretty much means your opinion is bullshit. That (I think) is why you get so many dullards who are over-confidant and cocky and infuriating, because if you're that certain that you're right, you are certainly a dullard. It's also why Jeremy Clarkson is such an asshole, probably. "In the modern world the stupid are cocksure while the intelligent are full of doubt." Some asshole said that once, I can't remember who it was and he was probably a jackass of some variety but he just might have been onto something. There's also an argument against democracy in it's modern form in here somewhere but fuck man, even I'm bored and I'm not the one trying to force myself to read this dog dirt so I'll spare that for another time. Though I am cruel I am kind, or something like that...

But seriously, critics. I told you we were coming back to this didn't I? No such thing as an empty threat when Luke McGinty's involved. This was actually meant to be a complete digression but I've just realised it's pretty similar to what I've already written about. My quarrel with critics is that you're supposed to appreciate their opinions about music or books or whatever even though it's only one guy's opinion. Is it just me that thinks that's bullshit? Now I realise that some people are experts in certain fields and I'm not trying to say all critics are dumbshits and you shouldn't listen to them ever. I would, for example, trust the opinion of Roger Ebert over that of my friend Delaney who's really into Adam Sandler, but the point is that art is fundamentally a subjective thing man. How can even an expert write about art as if he's dealing in facts? Remember the "almost six billion" thing from earlier? Well yeah. Sorry Ebert, you're fucking wrong. And if you're the sort of person who bases your choices or your opinions on critical acclaim the lack thereof, then I think maybe it's time you go and buy yourself a new D&G t shirt or convert to Catholicism or something.







*I remember another story along the same lines, but funnier. There's this nightclub back in my old hometown, it's called Delaney's Dogshit Doghole or something like that and it's the sort of place that a scholar might refer to as "a fucking bearpit." Anyway a friend of mine, whose name happened to be Delaney, was in there one night and he'd got chatting to this girl. And Delaney, he's a pretty decent guy, not much of a hump-'em-and-dump-'em sort you know? And he's trying to explain to this girl that he's he's the kind of man that wants to connect with someone on an emotional level instead of just pulling some slut in the nightclub, and how he's pretty disillusioned with the fact that the whole clientele of Delaney's seem just to be out to fuck each other. Pretty noble sentiments, I'm sure you'll agree. Well what his booze-addled mind managed to say to the girl was this: "I just think every girl in Delaney's wants to have sex with me." Again, good one. Now I could be wrong, but I'm pretty sure he went home solo that night...

Try The Fish

Tell you what, I had a lot I wanted to write about tonight. Serious intellectual discussion, philosophical debate, all that kind of thing. But I’m actually far too tired. Here’s a joke:

There were these two old boys, Hector and Willie, and I’m sorry to report their minds were both on the way out. Not what they used to be, you know? So one day Hector and Willie are sitting on the park bench when they hear the chime of an ice-cream van.* Hector says “I’ll tell you something, that’s really put me in the mind of an ice cream.” Willie agrees, “aye, I could handle an ice cream myself.” So Hector stands up, “alright, what are you having?” “I’ll just take a large cone,” says Willie, “but let me go with you.” Hector says “don’t be silly, sit there and I’ll be back with two large cones. No sense in both of us going.” Willie says “aye, but I know what you’re like Hector, you’ll forget something.” Hector says “What am I gonna forget? It’s two large cones…” and Willie says “nah, but I’m after a flake though.” “alright,” says Hector, “two large cones and a couple of flakes.” Willie’s still not convinced, “I’ll have to come with you Hector.” Hector says “you will not, I’ll remember.” Willie says “the thing is though, I want sprinkles. I don’t want to confuse you with sprinkles.” “Don’t talk pish,” Hector says, “I’m not about to get confused with sprinkles, now will you let me go?” Willie won’t let him go. “Hector you know very well you’re not up to this, something’s gonna get forgotten.” Hector says “it is not,; two large cones, flakes and sprinkles.” “And strawberry sauce,” says Willie. “Good grief, now he wants strawberry sauce as well?” “Aye I want strawberry sauce, that’s why I’ll have to come with you, cos you’ll forget.” Hector’s getting agitated; “listen, nothing’s getting forgotten alright? Two large cones, flakes, sprinkles, strawberry sauce; I’ve got it.” Willie fixes him with a hard look. “You’ve got it?” “Aye I’ve got it.” “You’re sure you’ve got it?” “Listen, I’ve fucking got it…” So Willie relents; “alright, away you go then…”

Willie sits there waiting. Minutes pass: five, ten. Hector’s not back yet. Willie’s checking his watch, wondering what’s taking his pal. Surely it doesn’t take this long to get a couple of ice creams? Eventually Hector returns and he hands Willie a package wrapped up in newspaper. Willie looks at it for a second a then he says “Hector, what the fuck’s this?” Hector says “what does it look like? It’s a single fish.” Willie’s aghast, he says “single fish? where’s my chips?”





*I had an uncle that went into business with an ice cream van once. It melted...

Thank you very much, I'm here all week...

I Got A Flow Make A B*tch Do A Cartwheel -or- Sound For Language -or- American Slang

Hey it’s good news everyone: I’ve been web-sensed. I don’t know if web-sense is a big thing or whatever, so here’s just a brief explanation: if you happen to work for the council or something like that and you’re reading this on your council-provided internet… well, the point is you won’t be reading this on your council-provided internet, because I swear too much and they won’t let you get on here any more. Either that or the photo I’m displaying was getting all the woman council employees too giddy and flustered and no work was getting done, but I’m pretty sure it’s all the swearing and wank-talk.

Now, you’ve heard the argument that swearing too much makes a person look like an idiot, shows your lack of a decent vocabulary or whatever. This is bullshit, here’s why: language exists the way it does for a reason, and to claim that there’s no need or excuse to use swear words betrays a very deep ignorance of the way it works. Did you ever see that experiment they did with the two pictures, and they told the participants that each picture had a name? They called one Kiki and the other one Bouba and asked people to say which one they thought was which, and something like 95% of people all said the same thing. Go and google it the images or something, see if you get it right. The point here (yes there’s a point) is that the way you speak isn’t just a random collection of sounds, words have a reason to sound the way they do and that’s why swearing exists. Remember ages ago when they did that stupid poll to find the nation’s favourite word? The winner was “serendipity.” Now here’s why that whole idea was bullshit: serendipity is a good word, but it’s only good for it’s purpose; the way it sounds sort of conveys, well not its meaning per sé, but the idea of it, you know? What I’m trying to say is that it’s a good word, but it’s not any better than fuck, for example, because they both exist to serve a certain purpose and they both succeed in doing so. Try it yourself, next time you step on a plug or whatever try yelling “serendipity” at the top of your voice, see how far you get. Ok, that’s all I’ve got about that.

Have you heard that Chiddy Bang track by the way? He’s got the trendy, by-assholes-for-assholes indie band sample, he’s got some very sketchy rhymes, he’s got the novelty gimmick video that he presumably initiated when the standard issue original failed to perform… in short, everything about it says “Luke, you hate this track.” But here’s the thing: I actually think it’s fucking great. Really. Ok, what else? Here’s the thing about sunglasses indoors/at night: this isn’t cool or lame in and of itself, how it works is that it’s about twice as cool or lame as the person doing it. Long story short - if you’re lame to begin with, don’t fucking do it. Also, I saw a guy in a G-Shock watch the other day. G-Shock watches - what happened there? And on a related note, does anyone know where Cilla Black is?

But seriously though, the new Gaslight Anthem record: on the first listen it sounds pretty good. Not the best they’ve ever done, but pretty solid y’know? Definitely worth a listen if you get a chance. It’s not “The Monitor” but it’s ok. And on that note, “The Monitor” by Titus Andronicus is fucking amazing. Listen to it immediately. Alright that’s enough, time for me to go to work and make dinner for assholes. Cheerio.

Hey Everyone! Come And See How Good I Look!

Ok, did anybody see the Leaders’ Debate the other night? I missed it myself but frankly I think there’s not nearly enough half-cocked bullshit political rambling on the internet right now, so it’s time for my two cents…

For all our non-UK readers out there (hi Paco!) the Leaders’ Debates are a stupid bullshit idea that someone decided to import from America to celebrate the General Election we’re about to have here in Britain and to give the leaders of our three main political parties an opportunity to go on TV and do their best John Kennedy impression while managing to look like a satisfied boy, a factory-rejected Ken doll and a lump of granite. And they’re bullshit for this reason: their whole point is to turn the election campaign into some sort of a bizarre popularity contest instead of an intelligent political debate. I don’t understand why so much stock suddenly has to be put into the leaders’ personalities, it’s seems like now we ought to care as much about their favourite colour as we do about their actual policies. Correct me if I’m wrong, but I was under the impression that a General Election is a thing designed to elect a new government, not the Nation’s New Best Pal. Here’s a good example: sidekicks. Have you noticed they all have sidekicks now? Gordon Brown and David Cameron have their wives and Nick Clegg has Vince Cable. Now the easy joke to make here, and it’s already been made ad nauseam, is to be like “what a gaffe by Clegg! Cameron and Brown have pretty wives for sidekicks and he has an old man! Lol!” but think for a moment… What’s happening is that Nick Clegg appears to be saying “vote for me, my right hand man is an astute political mind and arguably one of Britain’s most progressive economic thinkers,” whereas Brown and Cameron are both saying “no vote for me, I have married a stylish woman.” I don’t know about you, but I know which of those arguments makes more sense to me.

The trouble, though, is that they’ve got to have these debates and here’s why: because British politics, and it’s major players, in recent times they've started to look exactly the same; and the reason for this is pretty depressing. The way I see it, it’s as if our main parties don’t care about what they themselves believe anymore, they just want to convince the people that they’re out for their best interests, apparently attempting to follow a madcap “let’s please all of the people all of the time” sort of a policy, and that’s really not what it should be about. There’s been a lot of rhetoric about “broken politics” recently, well I figure if Labour and the Tories still had opposing ideologies then it might actually work, know what I mean? If politicians had any dignity or integrity they’d go ahead and say “forget about what the public want, here’s what I belive, take it or leave it.” That way maybe they’d get into power because they actually wanted to change something, as opposed to wanting to get into power for it’s own sake. By the way am I rambling at the moment? I suppose this is what happens when I try to be smart and don’t write about wanking. If this doesn’t make any sense feel free to stop reading at any time. Umm, back to the matter. Careerist politicians, to make an easy comparison with musical artists (do I do this too much?) are sort of like x-factor hopefuls or something. They’ll literally say or do anything if they think it’s gonna make them popular, which is pretty much the opposite of the integrity and honesty that some of the campaign’s popular soundbites have promised.

I could be wrong, but I think that brings us back to the beginning. I don’t want to vote for the guy that I‘d most like to have a beer with, or the guy that seems most convincing when he’s talking to a TV camera; the dude could have the charisma of JFK or be a one-eyed man o’ rock, if he’s got integrity then I’ll vote for him. So I suppose it’s just a shame Vince Cable isn’t handsome enough to be Prime Minister any more am I right? Ok, that’s enough of this.